Christmas Miracles?

There's something about this perticular holiday season that isn't sitting quite right with me. It's come too quickly. It's been 50 and 60 degree weather. I can't seem to focus on anything. It's just been a little off.

Two days ago, we found out that one of the teachers at our school was diagnosed with lung cancer, and that she would be in the hospital for treatment over the holiday. She had been sick with pneumonia since before thanksgiving, and just wasn't getting better. When we heard the news, there was sortof an inaudible gasp, and lots of "that just plain sucks."
I left that faculty meeting, feeling nothing any different than I've felt that entire day but, "man. What crummy news."

The very next day, we find out that her cancer is very terminal and not only have they moved her to the hospice wing of the hospital, but they don't anticipate her making it past the holiday. And again, for the past three days I am made of tin. I feel nothing. I'm sad, sure, but nothing really interferes with my daily thoughts or (lack of) emotions. I just have no reaction.

I wasn't too worried about this--I don't really react to things emotionally very often or well. I was more wondering *when* it would hit me. And if it would be too late when it did.


I came home from school today, and I called my mom to see if she and dad were in Tulsa yet. They're coming down this Christmas so we can all be together when Niki and Matt have their baby. My mom says that she and dad haven't been having the best day. Apparently when they woke up this morning and went to the hotel parking lot to thier car, someone had smashed out a window and taken everything out of it. My dad's golf clubs. My mom's medicines. All of the christmas presents they were bringing down. It's all gone.

My first reaction to this is total and complete anger. My parents are two of the kindest and most generous people I know (especially at Christmas) and somebody stole it all away from them while they were sleeping. My second reaction was sadness, because I know my parents, and they are going to try to fix it when they don't need to.
But my reactions were borderlining hysterics (for my empty tin chest, that is), and it really bugged me that I was reacting so much to "stuff" that can be replaced. I already know that it's all just "stuff."

So now, of course, I'm a horrible person for crying about vandalism and theft and not even batting an eye at cancer. But I think that my reaction to the break-in was the culmination of everything else finally spilling out. I'm learning more about myself every day, and I think as far as my emotions go I can only give all or nothing. And unless I have something (or several somethings) that pushes me to the point of overflowing, there's no sign of life.

All that being said,Miracles are miracles--whether they happen at Christmas or not. And I really don't think God times them to make our holidays happier. So pray for KC Randolph, her 9 year old boy, and the rest of her family. And praise God that you get to be with yours.

Mr. Orkin--the Man of My Dreams

One of my students today in classed asked me about my "special someone."
I told him that my only "special someones" were my family and my students. He promptly responded to this with a confident, "Ms. Herron, we need to find you a good man. Kyle, John, and I will get right on that."

My students have always been particularly curious about my personal life--information of which I never divulge to them. Last year I had a giant ORKIN poster on the front wall and the kids asked me where I got it. I replied that I got it from the Orkin Man, and one of the kids asked, "you know the Orkin man!?" Before I could even answer, another student says, "yeah! he's her boyfriend!"
Of course, I couldn't resist. "Yes, actually we've been dating for quite some time. He's the real reason I moved down to Oklahoma." Most of the kids definitely knew I was joking. And the ones who didn't, I assured I was serious, queuing the former to interject that we were getting pretty serious and actually probably would be getting married soon. And I just stood back and enjoyed this life outside of school that my students had created for me. Eventually, one student asks if he can call me Mrs. O. I just laughed, and so it began. Kids I didn't even have in my classroom would see me in the hall and say, "hey Ms. O!"

It's a lot of fun to let my kids be the authors of my imaginary life. They come up with the funniest things.
I tell that story because today the kids asked about Mr. Orkin. They asked me in the hall if Mr. O and I were still dating, and if they could come to the wedding. I told them absolutely! I said, "when I get married, you are all invited! It will be in Michigan--but you'll all be driving by then, so you can just carpool up!"
"Ms. Herron!" Came the reply, "that's so long from now! Why can't you just get married next year? You should tell Mr. O to work on that, and he'll get you a ring next year and then you two can get married."
Well, Mr. O--wherever you are--you get on that. My kids are waiting!

If You're Happy and You Know it :)

when the moon lights my path; laying in bed and watchin tv with my mom; jennifer's laugh; when drew times his farts; getting monthly decorative pedicures; running in 50 degree weather; the color red; great danes; classical guitars; fishing; giving high fives; gullible students; vanilla ice cream; holding hands; learning all the words to my favorite songs; going on really long drives; Michigan; birdie putts; Michelle's incredible analogies; my childhood; my sister is having a baby; my dad's saggy pants; camping; dressing like twins; swimming in lakes; seeing the stars; the antennae farm in OKC; whistling; fart noises; finding out ways man reflects the image of God; giving back scratches; Rasheed Wallace; making the first footprints in freshly fallen snow; scraping ice off my windshield; walking, running, or golfing in pouring rain; blowing dandelions around; Frogner Park in Oslo; thunderstorms or any other type of severe weather; logic puzzles; giving the perfect gift; being hugged-down; kisses from little kids; christmas lights; really really large American flags blowing in the wind; flip flop tan lines; roller coasters; knowing i am loved; cornbread with butter; planning my future with my best friend (even if we know it's just pretend)