First thing:
"no one ever made it a rule that you have to be more than best friends to be soul mates"
I read that on a caption of a photo of a friend of mine with one of her best friends. He is a boy. Now, there's the eternal question of the legitimacy of a truly "platonic" relationship. It's been said that there is never any point in any guy-girl relationship where either one or the other (or both) hasn't thought about the relationship being more than "just friends." That's nothing new. And I'm not going to say it's either true or untrue, because I don't really know for sure.
I do know that it is possible to actually be in a boy-girl relationship and be "just friends" and stay that way. Whether or not there are "feelings" there, nobody is forced to act on them. And friendship is real and it is possible to have no alterior motives.
Now, what I'm really not sure about is if I think "soul mates" exist. Do I think there is a perfect right person who can just be a person for me, to understand me and be there for me and tell me what's what whether I want to hear it or not? Maybe. Am I that perfect right person for somebody else? Quite possibly.(One thing that confuses me about soul mates: are they mutually exclusive? Or could my soul mate have a soul mate who isn't me? Not really important, I guess)
Where that caption caught my attention was the notion that if that perfect right person happens to be a boy, it doesn't mean that we're supposed to be (or ever get) married.
But on the other hand, what does it say if I have a perfect right person boy and I'm married to someone who isn't him? Why would anyone marry someone who isn't his or her soul mate?
I don't know the answer to the question, but the only way I can think to defend it is that if my perfect right person was female, does that mean that I need to marry her? No. It just means that my perfect right person to understand me is a girl.
I am pretty sure that it's possible to have a perfect right person ("soul mate" or not) who is of the opposite gender who is absolutely and truely nothing more or less than a best friend. But I think the biggest problem with this is the fact that it never looks strictly platonic through the eyes of other people. I don't think that's fair.
Second thing:
Sometimes I want to share with people that God loves them. Because there are a lot of people who think that there isn't a reason to like themselves. But there has to be. Because God created them, and loves them, and saves them, and rejoices over them with singing, and listens to them. And died for them, so they could be safe forever and ever. Because it is such good news. And if there is no other reason to feel worthy of anything, knowing about God's love could be enough to make somebody want to experience it. And learn about him and Jesus and his word.
But I find myself not saying any of those things, because I don't want to offend anybody. What if somebody tried to tell me all of that about Flopid, God of 7-eleven slurpees?
I know that God is truth, and that Flopid is nothing more than a false idol. But to people who follow and worship false gods, they really think it is the truth. How offended would you be if somebody blasphemed your truth?
Part of me knows it's obsurd to ever think that sharing God and Jesus with people should be offensive. And that it's only letting Satan get a little more ground every time I give in and keep my mouth shut. But how do I find the compromise between doing what's right, and offending someone else?
If someone tried to tell me all of the great things about this 7-eleven god, and read me verses from the slurpee bible to back it up and spent all this time telling me that my soul isn't safe unless I understand and experience this love--even if it was in a non-confrontational way--I would be sortof offended. Or else I would think this person was brainwashed and crazy.
How does this situation differ from someone unfamiliar with God being told all of this stuff?
Why are people offended by God?
And should I be concerned about not offending people at the risk of losing an opportunity for planting a seed?
How many opportunities have I thrown away to the devil?
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3 comments:
Kari, a long time ago and far away I was yer youth guy and you were my kids favorite babysitter! I tracked you down through a comment you left on the Emerson's blog. What great insights into the whole "soulmate" thing. You know, we have no instruction anywhere biblically about if there is one right person. In fact, culturally, everyone who was reading the Bible back when the Bible was written had arranged marriages! How does that work? Maybe, just maybe, our Western culture creation of "soulmate" comes from our Hollywood, always-a-need-for-a-happy-ending addiction we have. "Soulmates" can be created; It's work. All relationships are work.
Keep up the good writing. I'll visit often. Go to mine at: mackenziejim.blogspot.com
i've really got nothing to say, other than it was awesome to see you this weekend...
peace
brett
taking an example from dawson's creek...:-)
joey and dawson were soul mates because they grew up together, were best friends, knew everything about each other, and were truly safe with each other. there were times when they wanted more than friendship, but in the end all they had was a deep, passionate friendship.
joey and pacey were in love because they had experienced new things together, they had passion for each other, they wanted to change and grow together, and they were good at making-out.
so what can we learn from that...:-)
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